Harsh and I met in 2017 on Instagram. We instantly connected on our shared cultural backgrounds, our love for spicy South Asian food, and a shared desire for travel. We spent the next few months getting to know each other, never really expecting our friendship to turn into something more especially when we lived on the other side of the world from each other. He lived in India, while I was in Canada. Yet, it did. Our closeness over the years through life’s ups and downs made us realize that we wanted to make our long distance relationship flourish and grow. At the time, I was completing my Masters in Counselling Psychology at University of British Columbia (UBC), so life was hectic as a grad student. Harsh was there for me every step of the way, even encouraging me to prioritize my studies over our relationship at times. He was my rock and my best friend, and he still is to this very day. Somehow, we made it through the graduate school experience and finally met in person in Dec 2019. I spent four amazing months in India getting to know his life in person, and he proposed a month before I was due to leave for Canada. We got married in March of 2020, just days before the world shut down for the COVID pandemic. While things were chaotic in the world, we were able to find our own sense of peace and safety in each other. When I finally returned to Canada, we had to once again continue our long-distance relationship. This was one of the most draining experiences of our lives, because we felt like we were missing out on many of the newly married couple experiences in our first year of marriage. Yet, when Harsh finally joined me in Canada in 2021, it felt like we hadn’t missed a beat. Our love and sense of connection was just as strong as we remembered when we were physically together a year ago.
From the time that we first met, we’ve had some incredible situations that have tested our relationship. However, our love has grown through life’s ups and downs. We are a loving couple, who is hardworking, responsible and committed to our dreams and goals. We are so excited by the prospect of welcoming a surrogate into our lives to assist us in building a family that we both deeply desire.
Manmeet: I was born in India, but raised in Canada. At the age of two months, I contracted Polio, which led to paralysis of my right leg. I can stand with support, but I need to use walking canes for short distances and a wheelchair for long distances. This illness changed the projection of my family’s goals. My father left India and immigrated to Canada in hopes of providing me with a better life especially in terms of medical care that we could not afford back home. It took him 8 years to get permanent resident status. Those 8 years, my mom raised me as a single parent in a country that was inaccessible to those with disabilities. Her unwavering resolve to give me a “normal life” and my father’s sacrifice of leaving behind his family and friends have always inspired me to create a loving home for my future husband and kids. To me, being a parent means putting my child’s joys and pain at the forefront of my own needs. That’s the type of mom I want to be.
I’m very close to my family, specifically my brother. My younger brother, my only sibling, is 10 years younger than me. I still remember the day that he was born, I was super excited that I had a sibling because it had been tough growing up as an only child for so many years. I eagerly anticipated embracing the role of an older sister, relishing every chance to care for him as a newborn.
From early childhood, I have been heavily involved in my community through volunteer pursuits, such as the emergency department, Paediatrics, Canuck Place Children’s Hospice, crisis lines, etc. A big driving force for me to give back to my community has been my desire to help others. As an individual with a disability, I had so many generous people help me along in life and I have always desired to give back in some way. This desire to be a helper was the driving force for me to pursue counselling as a career. In my free time, I love to play wheelchair basketball and sledge-hockey, two new passions that keep me healthy and connected to others in my community. I hope to introduce my own child to the world of wheelchair sports one day so that he/she may realize that abilities can come in many different forms.
Harsh grew up in India as an only child. He grew up having a very active childhood, playing a variety of sports. His love was badminton, and he played competitively at university level. He grew up in an intergenerational household, loving the time he spent with his grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. Despite being an only child, he never felt lonely because he was always surrounded by a large extended family. Even though he’s halfway across the world from them now, he still has his support system and never feels too far away from his family!
For the last 3 years, I have been experiencing medical complications due to Polio that make it unsafe for me to carry a pregnancy to term. I’m currently on medications that help to maintain my health, which would be unsafe for a developing child in my womb. As a result, we were advised to pursue surrogacy. When I received this news, I was devastated. It felt like another poignant reminder of how I could not escape the shadow of my disability. Carrying a baby had always been a cherished dream of mine as a woman; now, it felt like another huge mountain that I had to climb on my journey towards motherhood. However, having Harsh by my side served to remind me that this wasn’t a mountain that I had to climb alone. He is one of the most caring and selfless people that I’ve ever met. His words of encouragement and unwavering support gives me strength to pursue surrogacy so that we can both achieve our shared dream to become parents. Thus far, we have created two PGT-A tested euploid embryos at our clinic.
Laughter consistently echoes throughout our home. We live in a joint family, which is a common characteristic of a South Asian home. We want our child to be surrounded by the love and the support of his/her grandparents and uncle so that he/she knows that there are multiple people who care about them. Whether it be his/her grandma teaching him/her the newest South Asian recipe, his/her grandfather teaching him/her how to garden, or his uncle teaching him/her how to skate and to play ice hockey, we want our child to grow up knowing that he has multiple adults in close proximity caring for his/her wellbeing. For us, the idea that “it takes a village to raise a child” holds significant importance, particularly from a cultural perspective.
In terms of our neighbourhood, we reside in a suburban house on a tranquil street that is predominantly occupied by families with young children. Our spacious backyard would provide ample space for our child to play, and we envision welcoming a dog into our family as a future companion for him/her. Located approximately an hour from Vancouver, our town offers an ideal setting for raising a family away from the hectic pace of city life. We have access to excellent hiking trails and well-equipped playgrounds nearby, making it a welcoming community for families, deeply rooted in the values of communal well-being.
Harsh works as a sales consultant at a wholesale company, while I work as a clinical counsellor with children and youth at a Child and Youth Mental Health office, and with adults in my private practice. We love to spend time outdoors (e.g., kayaking), watching shows on Netflix (we are big fans of the Bridgerton show!), and exploring new restaurants to satisfy Harsh’s passion for food as a dedicated foodie! We also love to travel, and to discover hidden gems in our city.
To our surrogate, we want to convey our heartfelt appreciation for your willingness to give us a chance to start a family. We are open to supporting you in whatever form that you need us to show up. We will do our best to make your pregnancy as happy and comfortable as possible. Since we both work, we will cover all costs and expenses associated with the surrogacy, and we will do our absolute best to ensure that you feel our gratitude throughout the entire journey. We want our relationship with you to be built on trust and friendship, ensuring that you feel valued for the entire duration of your journey in our lives, spanning from pregnancy and beyond.
Throughout the pregnancy, we would love to be in regular contact at least a few times a week. We would love for our surrogate to feel as though she is part of our family. Thus, we would love to check in to see how she and her family are doing, and if there is any way that we can support them as a whole. We would love to have our surrogate tell us about the developmental milestones of our growing baby and anything else that she would like to share with us. As first time parents, our surrogate’s generosity in sharing her pregnancy experience with us will be immensely valuable, allowing us to witness our baby’s developmental stages through her journey.
Following the pregnancy, we are eager to nurture and expand our relationship with our surrogate, respecting her comfort level regarding the frequency of contact. As someone who gives us the greatest joy, we want our surrogate to know that her needs will always be important to us. If she is comfortable, we would love to share photos and milestones of our baby with her. We will also share with our child how they came into the world, emphasizing the incredible individuals who played a part in their birth.
To our surrogate, we can’t even describe how much we long to meet you. Through your selfless gift, we will get to transform into parents, a dream that is incomplete without you. We are filled with anticipation at the thought of sharing our firsts with you – from hearing our baby’s first heartbeat, feeling their kicks, discussing our nursery plans, showing you the adorable baby clothes we’ve picked out, to finally, having you hand us our whole world after delivery. We are excited to begin this journey with you, and we eagerly await to hear from you!