Dutch Intended Parents Searching for a Gestational Surrogate
Location: Geldrop, Netherlands
Embryo Status: Embryo adoption in Process
Occupations: Transport of Dangerous Goods safety advisor (Daniël) / stay at home mom and dogsitter (Jessica)
We met in 2012 while Jessica was in the Netherlands for her cousin’s wedding. Daniël heard that this Canadian chick was coming and sent her a friend request on Facebook and after she accepted, invited her to join him and his friends for a soccer game. She accepted that too, thinking it would be fun to get to know some new people while on her holiday. The moment he walked into the room and she first saw him, they were drawn to each other and it was love at first sight. When she went to say hello she gave him a big hug (being all Canadian!) and he was a bit surprised! They spent the evening talking and getting to know each other, and then met up the 3 weekends of her holiday for a few dates. She also got to meet and spend some time with his two little kids, then aged 6 and 3 years old. They messaged every day during their time apart, and Daniël even sent her a recording of himself singing her a romantic Adele song and playing the piano, which clinched it for her - this guy was the one! She told him about her lifelong dream to be a mom, and her desire to foster and adopt children as well. He was willing to go on that journey with her and it was decided: We wanted to marry! But first she would have to go back to her life in Canada while we planned what the future would look like. After 4.5 years of a long distance relationship, we married on August 13, 2016, and Jessica moved to the Netherlands. The plan is to eventually move back to Canada, but for now we are content and have built a good life in Geldrop with our little doodle Phoebe. Oh and we still celebrate the anniversary of “Awkward Hug Day” every year!
Jessica: I am the oldest child of a Canadian mother and a Dutch father who had immigrated to Edmonton. Their relationship was one that bloomed quickly and they were married and had me 6 months later. Within the next couple of years my sister and brother were also born. My family was not rich when it came to money, but absolutely wealthy in love, affection, patience and care. My mother homeschooled all of us and we were part of a big homeschool community where we socialized with people of all ages, grades, nationalities, and every day was a new adventure! Our house was one that focused closely on God and our relationships with him and desire to serve others. We were outdoorsy, playing sports, hiking, camping, canoeing, enjoying day trips to lakes, skiing, etc. My parents are my heroes. They overcame a lot while always putting their children first, and instilling constantly that love and loyalty in family was important. I hold these lessons close and will show any child of mine how much I love and adore them every single day.
Daniël: I grew up as the middle child in a family with 3 kids, in the Netherlands. My father was very busy with work, but he made time for family activities and we spent hot sunny summer days at the beach, or going to the south of France for holidays. My family wasn’t especially close, but we were always there for each other when needed. I spent a lot of time outdoors and enjoyed kiting, biking, swimming, photography, playing the piano, and spending evenings and weekends with friends. During my high school years I spent time in France as an exchange student and went on church trips to Peru and Romania, all of which opened my world and gave me the desire to travel more and learn about other cultures. Canada had always been a place I wanted to go to, so meeting a Canadian girl was perfect!
Jessica was so grateful to have met a man who already had two children, as she suffered from severe PCOS and had been told that it would be unlikely she could bear children. As the years went by, dealing with a lot of pain, she was eventually diagnosed with a bicornuate (heart shaped) uterus and stage 4 endometriosis. All eggs were damaged by ovarian cysts and although the endometriosis is being successfully treated, the chances of being able to carry a baby to term were slim, due to the uterus abnormality causing no room for the baby to grow. The news was sad, but she had already wanted to adopt children so we went ahead with that plan. We couldn’t adopt a Dutch child as Daniël was considered “too old” at the age of 40, so we began the process of international adoption. We did a year of mandatory government classes on the subject and had decided on an agency and what country to adopt from. Unfortunately the Netherlands shut down international adoptions the day before our home study was to begin. We then began to look into the possibility of embryo adoption. We believe that each embryo is a little life, and we would love to bring that life to term and grow our family with the help of a surrogate!
Daniël’s two children are currently aged 16 and 14, and we have a foster son who is almost 15 years old. We get so much joy from parenthood and the relationships we have with all of them, and we would love to go on the adventure of having and raising a baby together too. All of our current children called Jessica by her first name, and it would melt her heart to hear a little one call her mommy!
We are active and outdoorsy people who love life, nature, being outside, adventure, but also enjoy a quiet evening with Netflix and snacks! We love doing escape rooms, both in person and table-top versions, board games, spending lots of time playing with and snuggling our dog and any others who might be staying with us, card games, trivia, reading, and traveling. Daniël enjoys a good ride on his mountain bike, boot camp, cooking, baking, playing piano, and is currently studying for a degree in psychology. Jessica looks after a lot of dogs and soaks in their goodness and loving hearts, loves a good book, a warm fuzzy blanket, chocolate, helping seniors, and video calls with family and friends back in Canada often to keep in touch.
A surrogate mother would be giving us the greatest gift of all time - a new life to treasure! I cannot even begin to describe the gratitude we would feel for that angel of a woman and what she would be doing for us!
All her costs concerning the pregnancy would be reimbursed by us, and we would send gifts of appreciation, cards, and provide whatever mental and emotional support we could during all stages of pregnancy, birth, and during her recovery. Also for her partner and children if she has those.
We would love to have a relationship with the woman granting us this indescribable gift. Would love to meet up in person during the beginning stages, and Jessica wants to come to Canada twice during the pregnancy to go along to ultrasound appointments and spend quality time with the surrogate, shopping together for maternity clothes for example. She would like to video call often to check in and make sure the surrogate mother was doing well and had everything she needed. If the surrogate mother was open to it, we would also love to send a picture every year of the family she had helped us to build. Our child will always know that he/she is precious and that we are so grateful that he/she could grow in another lady’s tummy before we met them.
Daniël & Jessica